Here are 9 of my favorite lessons from the weekend, and don't worry if you're not a blogger because these aren't blogging lessons. These are LIFE lessons!
1. Life is who you meet.
Sometimes when we're exhausted, in a rush, or just feeling shy, it may feel easier to ignore people or be curt with the idea in mind that "Oh I'll never see him again," but the truth is that you never know what person or conversation can lead to your next big opportunity.
Put yourself out there. Go to random events you'd kinda rather skip. Talk to people. Give out business cards. Tell total strangers about your blog, your projects, your dreams.
Treat all people genuinely and with kindness, and you'll be amazed at the doors that open up for you.
2. You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
Think about the people you talk to all day at work or in your social circle--are they the ambitious cheerleader types? Or the gossipy negative ones? Do you feel energized and inspired when you spend time with them? Or do they make you feel stuck and grumpy?
Pay attention to this, and make changes if you need to. Surround yourself with people who are doing the things you want to do, and let them inspire and push you toward achieving your own goals. If you work in an environment where the people tend to get you down, seek out other places where you can connect and share with some more upbeat folks. This might just mean asking to move to a different desk (blame the AC vents or the glare from the window). Or it could mean joining a club, making an effort to hang out with some of your best girlfriends more often, or even signing up for a class on a subject that fires you up.
Whatever you have to do, do it. Take charge of your situation and make a change for the good.
3. Get inspiration from others, but don't make them the standard for your own path.
But that doesn't mean that you should just shut down the computer and hide under your bed to preserve your sanity--that won't change anything and it certainly won't get you any closer to creating the life you want to live.
Instead, look to others for inspiration! Let them teach you, push you, and drive you to grow, all while keeping sight of the fact that we each have our own path.
There is no single right way or right timeline, so take the bits that resonate with you and use them as the kick you need to create your own kind of perfection.
4. Problems are merely opportunities for creativity.
In his talk, Tim described the Imagineer process for creating a project, from conception to completion. While describing the process, I noticed that the language he used was very deliberate, and that one word kept popping up: "opportunity."
I asked him about this, and he explained that for Imagineers, there is no such thing as "problems." There are simply opportunities for creativity.
Whenever they come up against a difficulty or issue, they ask themselves "What are the opportunities here?" and use it as a way to further reinforce their storytelling. He noted that once they adopt that mindset, it becomes easy--and even fun!--to find solutions to challenges.
As an example, he explained how the sprawling design of an African-themed restaurant necessitated huge weight-bearing columns throughout the dining room that would have taken away from the aesthetics of the environment. They chose to look at this as an opportunity, and instead turned the columns into large trees that ended up adding more to the design and the story they were trying to tell.
I loved this concept, and saw that it was instantly applicable to both my blog and my life. It's a given that we will have problems, but by looking at them as an opportunity to stretch your creativity and your resources, you will be able to come ahead stronger, wiser, and infinitely more incredible than you would have without the struggle.
5. Take time to dream BIG with no restraints.
I think we all need to establish a little Blue Sky Studio in our own life. Whether it's just a couple hours or a even a whole weekend a month of just crazy all-out no-limits dreaming and playing, we need to get in the habit of thinking BIG for ourselves.
What would you do if you could do anything? What would you want to achieve? Where would you go? What would you make?
Set yourself free to go as far as your imagination can take you. You might be surprised by just how achievable those dreams can be, once you dare to dream them.
6. Find ways to pursue your goals, right where you are today.
I started my blog a little over 5 years ago, because as much as I enjoyed the job I had as a magazine editor, my real passion was writing about food. While not 100% the dream that I had (which was to spend all day cooking, writing, and talking about food), starting a blog was a beginning, and it was a way of giving me at least a few hours a day of living my dream. Knowing that I had this place where I could go to every single day to do what I love, instantly made my life better without requiring any drastic changes.Jaden talked about how we ALL need something like this in our life. Whether it's on the weekends or a couple hours in the evenings after work, find a way to capture a little bit of that big dream you have, right where you are today.
One great idea that Jaden shared was negotiating for time. If you're offered a raise at work (or told there is no budget for one), try to see if you can instead trade that for a couple additional days off a month, or the flexibility to work from home so that you can travel or save those commuting hours. It may not be everything, but it's a little way of capturing more time for yourself to spend on the things that you love.
For me, one of my (many!) current dreams is to work in television regularly as a host on a food and lifestyle program, and while I don't yet have my own show or even a regular correspondent gig, I have been creating more and more opportunities for myself so that now I am on TV 2-3 (or even more) times a month. It gives me a few hours a month of doing the thing that I love and want for myself, and I know that just like with my blog, it will continue to grow until it's no longer a dream, but my reality.
7. Look beyond the obvious.
As an example, they talked about how they wanted to share their garden with their readers, but didn't want to do it the obvious way of just posting photos or a simple video tour. Instead, they decided to create a video following their dog around as she played in the garden chasing after bubbles.
The result was gorgeous, entertaining, and totally unexpected. I have zero interest in gardens and gardening, but I could watch that video 5 times straight.
As bloggers and creatives we can sometimes get stuck in a rut; this was a great reminder that to shake things up, we sometimes just need to look at things from a different perspective.
8. Find your truth, and share it.
Here's the thing, the answer to whatever you're thinking is pretty much always "no." Because you are NOT the only one. There are dozens and hundreds and maybe even thousands of us who feel that way, too, and would love to hear someone else say it first.
When bloggers and creatives come together, there is always a lot of talk about "authenticity." You have to be authentic, people say again and again. And it's true, but what does that really mean? What is authenticity?
To me, it's just that. It's sharing your truth. It's sharing your story. And your truth and your story are a collection of all those little moments. In the panel on building community, Lindsay from Love & Olive Oil wisely noted that "the more specific you are, the more people you will reach."
This doesn't mean that you have to divulge all your most private secrets. It simply means that you should understand the things that make you, you, and make them a part of what you're sharing. What makes you tick? What fires you up? What makes you laugh? People relate to passion. They relate to honesty. And all those specific little moments and quirks that make you feel totally alone, are actually the things that will speak to people the most.
9. Don't let complaints become your opening line.
Because here is the thing. There are always going to be things that we don't like. Boring speakers. Stinky bathrooms. Too much air conditioning.
If you're looking for something to complain about, you'll find it.
And this might be fine if it's just you and your best friend or husband commiserating, but if you're in a room full of new people (and potential networking contacts) don't let the complaints become your opening line. Don't let negativity be your first impression, because that is not going to make people want to get to know you.
Instead, talk about the thing you're loving. The thing you're excited about. Or just smile and say hello, and let the other person lead the conversation. Don't let a silly complaint get in the way of a potentially amazing new connection. (Which brings us right back to lesson #1!)
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I'd love to know if any of these lessons in particular resonate with you. I for one, am going to start off by making #5 a regular part of my day!
A Sweet Escape 2013 Update: There are only TWO bedroom spots left for this incredibly affordable and all-inclusive culinary weekend vacation. If you'd like to join us, click here for details and to register. (Hey--it's a great way to surround yourself with positive, like-minded people, just like in #2!) Don't miss out! I have some amazing surprises planned. It's going to be a truly special weekend!
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